Is Your Listening Tuned to the Right Station?
“There is no such thing as a worthless conversation, provided you know what to listen for.”
—James Nathan Miller, Author
Many people think effective communication is simply choosing the right words to say. I submit, however, that poor listening skills create the biggest barrier to good communication.
Effective communicators listen attentively, but even attentive listeners can go astray. If a radio is not finely tuned to the right station, the reception gets garbled. Similarly, to fully understand a speaker’s message, a listener must properly tune in to the purpose of the speaking.
By way of illustration, most of us have whined about a frustrating problem at some point. We often know what to do about our problem, but we want to complain first in the hope of garnering some sympathy. Our frustration increases when listeners respond with suggested solutions to the problem. That wasn’t the kind of listening we wanted.
Many listeners miscue about the appropriate kind of listening required because most of us have a preferred approach that we use until we understand that something else is needed. We need to switch listening approaches to fit various situations. […]